The Secret to a Happy Life
Never do anything you do not want to do.
There now we are finished with the entire secret to a happy life. Pretty sure you are not entirely finished with why I say this to be true though. Just for you, I will explain why I say this.
You will never be happy in a situation that is not bringing you joy of some type. It is impossible. Now the joy may be in the rewards of finishing a project but there is joy in it. The joy may be in pleasing someone else. The joy may be in just the physical ability to do the task. The joy may be in sharing or it might be finding your self in solitude. The truth of the matter is that we can not be happy unless we are doing things that bring us joy in some way. Either resolve it or walk away.
We are intended to be filled with happiness and joy. So much, too much, time is spent on looking at things or situations that cause us to feel emotions not compatible to joy and happiness. The world is full of distractions and diversions. The world can do whatever it wants to do but only you can decide how to feel about a thing. We might cry, feel pain or grief which is opposite of joy and happiness but we can be gentle with ourselves during this time of healing until we find our joy and happiness once again. It is not a place we must remain in. Either resolve it or walk away.
When a woman once asked, “how can I be happy when so many horrible things are happening in the world”. A wise woman (Deloris Cannon) asked a question in return, “how many of these things are happening directly in your own life?” The woman said, “none, but I must do something about what everyone else is doing.” The reply was, “Why?”. Note: this is only a small clippet of that conversation. My personal interpretation is this of that conversation. If trying to correct what you see as incorrect makes you happy then do it but do it with a joyful heart. It is not our job to FIX anyone else, it is our job to do what brings us joy which may be planting a tree or sending money to a war torn country or simply giving someone a hug today. Whatever it is though, do it with joy in your heart and you will be happy in the doing of the thing. Either resolve it or walk away.
I have never worked at a job that made me feel unhappiness. This is a true statement. I do not condone anyone in my life this action either. If a going to a job brings joy, happiness and a sense of accomplishment then we eagerly share in the joy of it. Of course, there are also less than joyful things that happen. The question is this, so what did you do about it? What I have found is the correcting of the situation brought great joy and happiness even when it was leaving the job for another possibly happier one. Either resolve it or walk away.
Life is exactly this way. Do not clean your house and feel horribly about having to clean it. If you feel horrible then simply do not do it. Does that make you feel better? It is no one else’s job to bring you happiness or joy, that is an inside job. We are free to walk away from situations that bring us unhappiness, where there is no hope in finding the joy contained within it. If you decide to make yourself happy and it brings unhappiness to others then talk about it but do not take on their unhappiness as your own because it does not belong to you. Either resolve it or walk away.
If you are compelled to do a thing that you do not want to do, find the value in doing the thing. That value is there somewhere. When you find it then go for it with all of your might and be happy. I am thinking of paying my taxes here. I do not like paying taxes but I sure do like many of the things that contribution pays for. There is joy in receiving the benefits of paying those taxes so write that check joyfully knowing that because of it you don’t have to worry about the roads being paved and if they are not then hey, there is always someone to yell at over it. Either resolve it or walk away.
Oh I can easily get caught up in how life is not fair. More specifically I really enjoy making excuses for why life is not fair to me. Those are not very happy moments. The great news is that I don’t have to be that other person. I mean look at them, is that how you want to be? Better to be happy being who you are than regretting who you are not, don’t you think? Either resolve it or walk away.
It is so easy to get caught up in judging others lives. I ask myself during those times if I am spending enough time judging my own life OR am I distracting myself because I just don’t want to fix what is at my disposal to fix. Every time, I have decided that there is little I can do about what someone else decides to do. It is then time to go back to being happy in doing all of the things I want to do which is my current experiment toward being even happier. So after firing off a letter or in some way voicing my displeasure over the thing, I let it go. Either resolve it or walk away.
So the secret of happiness is quite simple. Never do anything you do not want to do. If you decide that not doing that thing brought you unhappiness then simply change your mind.
John 14:27 niv
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
Shonique Benu 